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The experts are at it again!
Recent research by Montpelier University concludes that 'first borns' are more selfish and less co-operative because the arrival of a sibling has a negative impact on their personality, making them wary of others and their motives!!
So, what about all those little mother hens or big brothers who go out of their way to care and protect?
In an attempt to answer this, I asked my own kids. The eldest didn't have time to talk and my youngest, who contrary to research is much taller than his sister (see report), was relaxed about the whole thing.
Maybe the research is right?, but in my opinion, all kids can be all things and it's down to how they're raised from birth, the values we instil in them and who and what they listen to.
We have a big part to play and you know what...it's the best 'game' ever.
Let me have your thoughts.
See report here:
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1234550/Firstborns-selfish-youngsters--likely-achieve-greatness.html
I agree with you!!!!Its all about basic nature and a lot to do with nurture.
ReplyDeleteMy eldest can be selfish, but he was an only child til he was six!!! If anything he is less so now. You've got to ask the question, is it more about having been the centre of attention that makes the eldest selfish(if in fact they are)rather than the negative effect of a sibling coming along.
I think as parents we have enormous control over how our kids adapt to a new baby. If the eldest is involved from the start, not left feeling pushed out, they learn so much about sharing.
As for each successive child being shorter because they are competeing for resources. What a load of rot!!!!! My husband is the middle of three boys and the eldest is the shortest and the youngest the tallest.
I think the benefits far outway the negatives and if we actualy took any notice of these little bits of questionable research we would tie ourselves in knots trying to do the right thing!!!!
All we need is a bit of common sense!!!
Hi Jan
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments.
I think you're right, reading this type of research and believing in it are two different things.
Having two or more children brings even greater opportunity to develop positive attributes for the parents and the children...why does research often look at the negatives?
John